The Basics

In this lesson, we outline how to structure manager 1:1s so they become one of the most powerful tools for growth, clarity, and alignment in the IC–EM relationship.

• We highlight that the gold standard for 1:1s is weekly, recurring, and 30 minutes long, which is long enough for meaningful depth but manageable on a manager’s packed calendar.
• We stress that cancellations should be rare because these meetings are the “lifeblood” of the relationship and the primary space where trust, alignment, and problem-solving happen.
• We recommend keeping a running meeting notes document with agendas, discussion points, and assigned action items to ensure continuity and accountability.
• We emphasize that although 1:1s take only ~1–2% of our weekly hours, they influence 30–70% of how quickly we grow and how effectively we leverage our EM.
• We reinforce that strong engineers prepare intentionally for these meetings—coming with notes, plans, and reflection—rather than waiting passively for their manager to drive the conversation.