General Career Direction Principles

We close with guidance for people who feel completely unsure about where to go next in their tech careers.

Here are the core points from the lesson:

- We suggest that early-career engineers, when possible, start with a big tech company for 1–2 years to gain stability, strong compensation, and a solid learning foundation—then use that platform to explore what they truly want.
- We recommend deliberately experiencing different company archetypes (startup, midsize, big tech) because each environment teaches different skills, exposes us to different cultures, and clarifies our long-term preferences.
- We emphasize that career needs change with age and life complexity—stability tends to matter more in our 30s and 40s—and that most big-tech engineers ultimately transition to smaller companies to find scope and growth.
- We add that when in doubt, choose a company where software engineering is core to the business, not a peripheral function; being in the “engine room” of a product-focused tech company dramatically increases learning, opportunity, and long-term career resilience.

Breaking Down Startups

We break down what it really means to join a VC-backed, high-growth startup and how the experience differs from big tech.

Here are the core points from the lesson:

- We outline the major upsides of early-stage startups: massive technical scope, the highest possible career ceiling, and deep fulfillment from directly shaping a company’s destiny—especially when joining at Series B or earlier.
- We explain the risks: early startups are unstable, resource-constrained, and extremely high-pressure, where production issues can threaten the company’s survival and where chaos is normal, not exceptional.
- We show why growth is the single most important signal when evaluating a startup: growth increases technical complexity, headcount, leadership opportunities, and the likelihood of exceptional financial upside; stagnation is a strong red flag.
- We contrast this with agencies/consultancies, noting they rarely offer strong long-term growth for early-career engineers unless someone is already a world-class expert—making startup or big-tech paths much more reliable career foundations.

Breaking Down Big Tech

We outline the real benefits and drawbacks of joining big tech, focusing on what actually matters for long-term career growth rather than the hype.

Here are the core points from the lesson:

- We explain that the biggest advantage of big tech is prestige. Having Google, Meta, Amazon, or Microsoft on our résumé dramatically increases future job opportunities, recruiter response rates, and long-term career mobility.
- We highlight additional strengths: top-tier compensation, strong and reliable learning environments, and overall consistency in job security, interview success, and career progress, all of which compound after a few years inside a major tech company.
- We walk through key drawbacks: massive company size makes it hard to find meaningful scope, many hard problems are already solved, work-life balance can be demanding, and advancement requires strong communication and leadership skills—not just coding ability.
- We stress that big tech isn’t ideal for everyone; engineers who prefer deep, heads-down coding or highly autonomous environments may struggle in the bureaucracy and stakeholder-heavy nature of these organizations.

How To Do Research

We walk through how to actually evaluate companies and teams, emphasizing that good information is hard to find and rarely lives in public reviews.

Here are the core points from the lesson:

- We stress that big companies aren’t monolithic—cultures vary widely across thousands of teams—so the most reliable way to assess a company or team is to tap into our network, where trusted people can share accurate, firsthand experiences.
- We highlight why building deep relationships in school and at work is invaluable: our network expands our access to real data over time, and meaningful connections (teammates, managers, peers) often shape our opportunities more than technical ability alone.
- We suggest complementary methods—reverse-interviewing during the hiring process, reading engineering blogs, following tech news, and checking curated communities—to gather signal, while warning that Glassdoor skews too positive and Blind skews too negative due to self-selection.
- We show that even venture capital, which allocates billions in tech, runs almost entirely on networks and backchannel references—underscoring that our own career decisions benefit from the same relationship-driven information flow.

Overrated Career Goals

We explain which attributes engineers tend to over-prioritize and why doing so often leads to bad career decisions.

Here are the core points from the lesson:

- We see many early-career engineers chase trendy product spaces (ML, AR/VR, blockchain) without genuine passion, ignoring the high risk that trends fizzle and leave teams stagnant; survivorship bias makes the rare success stories seem more common than they are.
- We highlight a similar trap with technical stacks: engineers often assume “more modern is better,” jumping between new technologies and hurting long-term growth, when stable, proven stacks at strong companies typically offer better learning and career durability.
- We show that over-prioritizing level/title or short-term compensation can backfire, since inflated titles at weak companies and high pay tied to terrible work-life balance rarely lead to long-term career success or well-being; growth opportunities and supportive teams tend to drive compensation naturally over time.
- We stress that compensation is multi-variable (base vs. equity vs. upside potential), and examples like Barnes & Noble illustrate how deceptively high salaries may underperform compared to equity-rich tech roles over a multi-year horizon.

Promotion Expectation Examples (Good vs. Bad)

In this lesson, we show how vague career frameworks aren’t enough for real growth—and how transforming generic expectations into detailed, personalized criteria creates clarity, direction, and stronger promotion outcomes.

- We explain that most companies’ career matrices are extremely generic (“have broad influence in code review”), making them nearly useless for understanding what to *actually* do to reach the next level.
- We demonstrate how to replace vague statements with concrete, customized expectations that clearly outline the **delta** between current level and next level.
- We give an example from Meta: mid-level engineers (E4) typically review code only in their domain, while senior engineers (E5) are expected to review code across unfamiliar modules, broader systems, and even sister teams—showing multiplicative impact.
- We highlight that this level of specificity makes it far easier for us to understand, track, and execute on what “the next level” actually requires.
- We emphasize that crafting a detailed plan also has a perception benefit: it signals seriousness, ownership, and thoughtfulness—making managers more likely to advocate for our promotion.

Promotion Dialog Examples

In this lesson, we examine how *not* to ask for a promotion, then show how to reframe the conversation in a way that aligns incentives, builds trust, and opens up productive dialogue with our EM.

- We highlight that asking “Can I get promoted?” is a poor approach because it’s self-focused, lacks evidence, feels transactional, and corners the manager into a yes/no response.
- We break down why this framing fails: it signals entitlement, doesn’t show impact, ignores team goals, and provides no data or context for advocacy.
- We offer a better alternative: expressing commitment to the team, desire to increase impact, and asking what steps are needed to reach the next level—an open-ended, collaborative question.
- We explain that managers value signals of long-term commitment and team-oriented motivation, not demands based on tenure or frustration.
- We reinforce that smart framing aligns our goals with the manager’s incentives: helping us grow increases team impact, which helps them succeed too.

Framing The Dialog

We cover how promotions actually work, why they’re not guaranteed even if we’re performing well, and how to talk about them with our EM in a way that aligns incentives and builds trust.

- We explain that promotions require **both** performing at the next level **and** an organizational need for someone at that level—otherwise even great performers can’t move up.
- We note that promotion discussions require trust; bringing up promotions too early (e.g., in week one) backfires because the manager doesn’t yet know our work or commitment to the team.
- We warn that reorgs can derail promotion momentum when a new manager must advocate for us without shared history; coordinating between old and new managers helps mitigate this.
- We highlight that promotions are meant to signal that we already operate with higher scope, independence, and cross-org trust—not something to wish into existence.
- We emphasize framing promotion goals in terms of **increasing team impact** rather than title or compensation, since managers (especially in tight-budget environments) prioritize engineers who help them deliver more impact, not those who simply want advancement.

Be Upfront About Your Goals

In this lesson, we emphasize the importance of sharing our performance goals openly with our EM so they can effectively advocate for us during performance reviews, which are human-driven, subjective, and highly dependent on manager alignment.

- We highlight that performance ratings are not generated by an objective system (i.e. they’re decided by people), so managers need clear insight into what rating we’re aiming for to advocate properly.
- We stress that “no negative feedback” does *not* mean we’re on track for a good rating or promotion; assuming this is one of the most common and costly mistakes ICs make.
- We reinforce that 1:1s are the central place to share our target rating or promotion timeline, whether we’re aiming for “meets,” “exceeds,” or a promotion, so we can then build a plan with our EM.
- We note that even if our goal is simply to maintain solid performance (e.g., a 3/5), we should still say so explicitly to avoid slipping into a low rating unexpectedly.
- We share a story illustrating how unchecked assumptions about performance can lead to disappointment—and how early, honest conversations could provide clarity and opportunities to improve.

Having The Meeting

In this lesson, we walk through exactly how to run a high-impact 1:1 with our EM by using the time intentionally to build trust, surface wins, work through challenges, and create momentum through clear action items.

- We start each meeting with 2–5 minutes of personal check-in to strengthen rapport, since life and work affect each other deeply.
- We share weekly wins to stay visible and ensure our contributions are recognized—while also making future performance review writing much easier.
- We move through our pre-seeded agenda topics (e.g., promotion planning, feedback digestion, team conflicts), which flow smoothly because we prepared them ahead of time.
- We close with clear action items for both sides—then begin the next week’s 1:1 by reviewing whether the previous actions were completed.
- We reinforce that framing wins with a “so what?” (impact or next step) and writing notes live during the meeting both strengthen trust and make the manager feel valued.

Before The Meeting

In this lesson, we dig into how to prepare for 1:1s so they’re consistently high-value and how thoughtful prep not only improves the conversation but also prevents cancellations and protects our time.

- We advise seeding the 1:1 agenda at least 24 hours in advance so our EM can “pre-compute”—arriving prepared instead of reacting on the spot to complex issues.
- We recommend prioritizing agenda items, putting critical topics first in case time runs short, and leaving lower-priority items for follow-up on Slack if needed.
- We highlight that surprising a manager with heavy topics during the meeting leads to wasted time and weaker guidance, whereas advance notice empowers them to think deeply and respond effectively.
- We explain that sending a thoughtful agenda also makes it harder for the manager to cancel or move the meeting, since it clearly shows we’ve invested effort and have meaningful topics ready.
- We reinforce that consistent preparation creates smoother, more productive discussions and helps us extract maximum value from the limited 30 minutes we have each week.

Be Vulnerable

In this lesson, we highlight the importance of vulnerability in building a strong, supportive relationship with an engineering manager—because they can only help us if they understand what we’re going through.

- We stress that EMs can’t read minds; if we’re struggling, whether with a teammate, a project, or something personal, we should tell them so they can protect our well-being at work.
- We explain that good managers act like part-time therapists, and sharing when things are rough allows them to adjust workload, mediate conflicts, or at least offer support.
- We note that vulnerability builds trust, just like in friendships outside of work, and that trust significantly improves how effectively we collaborate.
- We clarify that we shouldn’t overshare, but we also shouldn’t hide everything—sharing selectively helps EMs understand who we are and how to help.
- We reinforce that showing vulnerability increases the “trust meter,” strengthens the partnership, and ultimately unlocks more powerful support from our EM.

Engineering Managers Day-To-Day

In this lesson, we break down what an engineering manager’s day-to-day really looks like—why their calendars are packed with meetings, how they handle technical planning, and why the emotional side of the role is often underestimated.

- We highlight that EM calendars are dominated by 1:1s, alignment discussions, and cross-team negotiations, much of which shields us from logistical or resourcing debates.
- We explain that managers need enough technical depth to estimate project scope, evaluate dependencies, and participate meaningfully in planning without writing code themselves.
- We note that much of the real work happens outside meetings—reviewing docs, giving feedback, writing updates, and communicating progress upward to directors and VPs.
- We emphasize that people management is a huge portion of the job: coordinating collaboration, following up for junior engineers, resolving interpersonal issues, and handling performance challenges.
- We discuss the emotional burden managers carry handling compensation, performance ratings, personal struggles, and burnout and how this makes them part-time therapists as well as leaders.

How Engineering Managers Are Evaluated

In this lesson, we walk through how managers are evaluated, what “meeting” versus “exceeding” expectations looks like, and how we as ICs can help them succeed, which in turn helps us.

- We emphasize that a manager’s core responsibility is delivering team impact—not promotions, not firing—so our goal is to help them maximize that impact.
- We learn that strong managers are influential: they build relationships, earn trust, and can meaningfully sway decisions both across and above the team.
- We outline “managing down,” which includes recruiting top engineers, retaining high performers, setting priorities, enabling growth, and dealing directly with low performers through feedback, PIPs, or transitions.
- We highlight the importance of retention as a key evaluation metric—if everyone wants to leave a manager’s team, leadership sees that as a failure.
- We explore “managing up,” where managers frequently provide updates to directors/VPs, take ownership of escalations, and proactively communicate timelines, issues, and product health to leadership.

Engineering Manager Responsibilities

In this lesson, we talk about understanding incentives, especially your manager’s, as a key to navigating your career and collaborating effectively. By assuming people act in their own self-interest, we better understand how managers operate and how to work with them.

- We frame a “model of the world” where we assume people act selfishly, helping us predict behavior and align with our manager’s incentives.
- We note that understanding how an engineering manager is evaluated allows us to help them look good—and in doing so, we benefit too.
- We highlight that the EM role is challenging: they’re responsible for the team’s impact without writing code themselves, focusing instead on empowering and unblocking engineers.
- We clarify that growing engineers is only part of the role—EMs also handle hiring, firing, and performance reviews; sometimes their job is not to help us grow but to manage us out if needed.
- We describe additional responsibilities like removing cross-team blockers, resolving interpersonal issues, and creating team “synergy,” which includes a wide range of people- and process-related challenges.

Tailoring Your Answers

If you want direct interview support from Alex and Uzair, take their live Maven course with discount code **TARO10**: <https://maven.com/alex-kliotzkin/acing-em-interviews>

To deliver unforgettable interview answers, we need to learn how to tailor our responses to match the company, the role, and the specific audience we’re speaking to. This session explains how to adapt our stories based on context, organization type, and our own leadership philosophy—even when we haven’t faced a specific scenario before.

- **Tailor Stories to the Team and Business**
  - We must deeply understand the hiring team and the company’s business context to highlight the most relevant parts of our story.
  - Even small adjustments—altering 10% of a story—can have a big impact in aligning with the company’s values and needs.
- **Adapt Answers Based on Company Type**
  - For example, when answering a question about influencing stakeholders, we need to highlight different dynamics depending on whether it’s a startup (external stakeholders like customers or investors) or a big org (internal cross-functional teams).
  - Similarly, questions about balancing delivery vs. quality should be approached differently for consulting roles (focus on fast delivery and milestones) vs. product roles (focus on long-term impact, maintainability, and operational excellence).
- **Responding to Questions You Haven’t Faced Before**
  - If we haven’t directly experienced a situation (e.g., managing underperformers or doing capacity planning), we should draw on adjacent stories and clearly articulate our leadership philosophy and approach.
  - It’s helpful to describe what we’d do in the first 90 days on the job—such as building a plan or upskilling—and how that reflects our values and learning mindset.
- **Use Leadership Philosophy as a Guide**
  - Our answers should reflect consistent values, such as building high-performing teams, holding people accountable, and prioritizing quality.
  - Even without a direct experience, framing our response through this philosophy helps convey credibility, ownership, and potential.

Getting Extra Help

If you want direct interview support from Alex and Uzair, take their live Maven course with discount code **TARO10**: <https://maven.com/alex-kliotzkin/acing-em-interviews>

Get 1 on 1 coaching from Alex here (mention Taro and get 10% off): <https://www.alexkliotzkin.com/>

To succeed in Engineering Manager interviews, we need to do more than prepare our answers—we must *practice intentionally and iteratively*. This video highlights how structured practice can dramatically improve our communication, clarity, and confidence.

- **Mentally Rehearse with Visualization:** We should regularly visualize being in the interview, anticipating questions, and mentally walking through our stories and responses. This builds fluency and composure.
- **Write Stories for Guidance, Not Scripts:** Documenting our stories helps solidify what we want to say, but we shouldn’t memorize or regurgitate them. The goal is clarity on the *core signals* and themes we want to convey.
- **Record and Review Ourselves:** Watching ourselves on video is uncomfortable but invaluable. It reveals nervous tics, verbosity, or lack of clarity, and helps us iterate quickly.
- **Practice with Others for Realistic Feedback:** Mock interviews with someone—ideally a professional coach—simulate real pressure and provide tailored feedback. This is the most effective way to get interview-ready

Going From Good To Unforgettable

If you want direct interview support from Alex and Uzair, take their live Maven course with discount code **TARO10**: <https://maven.com/alex-kliotzkin/acing-em-interviews>

To turn our engineering manager interviews from good to unforgettable, we need to move beyond structured responses and tap into a deeper level of storytelling that integrates our leadership philosophy, self-awareness, and clarity of thought. This video teaches us how to do exactly that by weaving together frameworks, personal reflection, and strategic communication.

- **Pair STAR with Philosophy and Frameworks:** We start with the STAR method (Situation, Task, Action, Result), but go deeper by clearly highlighting the conflict in the situation and pairing our actions with leadership philosophies and mental frameworks. This helps reveal not just what we did, but *why* we did it and how we think as leaders.
- **Answer the “Question Behind the Question” (QBQ):** Every interview question has a hidden layer—what the interviewer *really* wants to know. For example, “Have you dealt with underperformance?” isn't just about that event; it’s probing our ability to have hard conversations, uphold standards, and lead consistently.
- **Embed Systems, Frameworks, and Learnings:** Our answers should demonstrate how we operate systematically. For instance, when describing how we mediate conflict, we explain our decision-making framework and show how it was applied in real situations, reinforcing our credibility and maturity as leaders.
- **Think Beyond the Surface:** Questions like “How do you motivate your team?” are really asking about our leadership style, understanding of technical people, and ability to balance individual, team, and org-wide goals. We must address these nuances and explain how motivation is an ongoing, intentional process.
- **Use the EM Interview Formula:** The real formula for standout interviews is *(QBQ) + (Philosophy + Systems + Frameworks) + (Real Story + Learnings).* This holistic approach helps us craft answers that are authentic, insightful, and tailored to what EM interviewers truly care about.
- By leaning into this deeper method, we don’t just pass interviews—we leave a lasting impression.

STAR

If you want direct interview support from Alex and Uzair, take their live Maven course with discount code **TARO10**: <https://maven.com/alex-kliotzkin/acing-em-interviews>

Engineering manager interviews focus heavily on **behavioral assessments**, and using a structured response framework like **STAR** can help clearly demonstrate leadership competencies and impact. STAR stands for **Situation, Task, Action, and Result** and is widely recommended for leadership roles due to its clarity and depth.

- **Situation**: Set the context of your story—when, where, and why it happened—so the interviewer understands the environment and background.
- **Task**: Define your responsibility in that situation and any challenges you faced while addressing it.
- **Action**: Detail the specific steps *you personally* took, what you owned, and how you worked with others.
- **Result**: End with measurable outcomes like cost savings, quality improvements, time to market, or customer/team impact. Show the success and its scale.

Homework: Define Your Engineering Management System

If you want direct interview support from Alex and Uzair, take their live Maven course with discount code **TARO10**: <https://maven.com/alex-kliotzkin/acing-em-interviews>

To answer engineering manager (EM) behavioral interview questions effectively, it’s essential to clearly articulate your **leadership style and decision-making frameworks**. Interviewers expect thoughtful, structured responses that show how you operate as a leader across the core responsibilities of the role.

- **Three Core EM Responsibilities**: Every EM must deliver results, lead the team, and manage stakeholders. You must show systems and habits that support all three.
- **Delivery Systems**: Explain how you ensure *sustainable delivery*—using tools like KPIs, OKRs, sprint metrics, dashboards, and demolocation strategies.
- **Team Leadership**: Be ready to share your approach to building *high-performance cultures*, setting team structures, conducting 1:1s, growing individuals, and setting vision and expectations.
- **Stakeholder Management**: Detail how you *influence and align* stakeholders—through communication systems, relationship building, regular reporting, and rituals like syncs and buy-ins.

Writing down these frameworks helps reinforce your leadership identity and provides a solid foundation for compelling interview storytelling. Let me know if you’d like help turning this into a worksheet or practice guide.

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