Akamai Technologies

Very security conscious. You can work remotely, but you can't get promoted or transfer if you do.

Nobody seems to know what is going on.

Mandatory noncompete, and other employers know Akamai's reputation for non-compete litigation.

Impossibly fragmented social structure.

Pay was fair but not great.

Benefits were below average.

Perks were useless.

Work computers are several generations old and required to run out-of-date operating systems.

They acquire companies at a staggering pace, promising "Trust Akamai with your career" to a room full of people, 30% of which have just been told you have 3-6 months to finish up and close the door behind you. This is between offensive and tactless.

Put some phone numbers on your intraweb.